Yesterday I read the best blog post HERE about learning to say “no.” I couldn’t have read it at a better time. I have never been good at saying no, but until chronic illness reared its ugly head it wasn’t much of a problem. I think I tend to say yes a lot because I feel like being dependable, reliable, and helpful are some of my better qualities, and I hate to give them up. So even when I feel terrible, I tend to say yes, because I want to be nice person. Being sick has taken a lot of things away from me, but I do not want it to stop making me a “nice” person. However, what I realized yesterday (and yes, I know I should have realized this sooner) is that when I do say no, I am not only taking care of myself and my physical needs, but with that I am taking care of my family and their needs, because they need me to be functioning. And my family is the most important thing. So I shouldn’t feel guilty about saying no, right?
If only it worked that way.
I have an overdeveloped guilt complex, but it is something I am working on. I think I just need to find other ways to help people, ways that require minimal energy. As always, it is a work in progress.