Not that I am an expert at parenting or anything, but I really have learned a few things along the way.
When I first got sick I used to think “this would be so much easier if I didn’t have kids, the people who are sick that don’t have anyone to take care of have it easy.” I would read stories of people who laid around all day and rested, and I was jealous. I thought things would be so much easier if I could do that.
One day it came to me though, I need to stop seeing my kids as a barrier to me getting needed rest, I need to start seeing them as what keeps me motivated and keeps me from focusing on the pain. I realized that my kids are a blessing, they force me to be up and active, even when I feel awful. Plus, they bring so much joy to my life. If I was sick and home all alone every day resting, who would make me laugh? Nothing brightens your day more than when your four year old asks you if they tree in the front yard is a deciduous tree (she really asked me that, and was very disappointed when I told her I couldn’t remember what deciduous even meant). Or when when your baby boy giggles hysterically every time you tickle him.
My beautifully babies have brought me so much joy, I’m so glad I have them even though on the surface it has made this illness more difficult.